The Daily Life of a....ME!!

after 10 years..

2006-06-23T08:50:00.000-07:00

hahah...oh well after millions of seconds..im back into my blog..:)) heheh..well nothing really important... just wanted to show up..if ever someones still reading my blog...hi..hhehehe...well nothing really interesting in my life...hhaha.:)) college is just so fun!? and my hubby 2...and boo,bhie,bunny,sweetie,beb and everyone else...purple talongs rock...:)

POP ME!?

2006-05-14T03:22:00.000-07:00

its the 14 of may and im again in the lounge of the Philippine Airlines here in Cebu, on my way back to manila!? gosh...when i just gave up and when i accepted that it could never happen...i recieve a call in the middle of the night!? yah..and i got shocked from things we talked about in the fone, i just came home from the beach...Still in the shore i got the call...and gosh, i got so surprised...it really made me jump in JOY!! then the next day!? NOTHING! absolutely NOTHING!? 2 days later, a message came?! GRABE NA ITO!? so kamusta ka naman jan!? parang BUBBLE!? nawawala nalang...tapos bumabalik!? CAN YOU MAKE UP YOUR MIND!? gosh...it makes the matters worse...

why does everyone just leave me!?

2006-05-05T20:24:00.000-07:00

its the 6 of may...im in the lounge of Philippine Airlines...soooper bored...im on my way to cebu right now...actually ive been there...its just that i can't take anymore of it here in manila...id rather be there than here....its just sooper complicated here...everyone i love and like..just leaves me...so harsh!? have you ever heard of the word CLOSURE!? thats all i need..not you bursting like a bubble and disappearing in thin air...then like a gush of wind you come along and tell me SMILE!? how the hell can i smile in a situation like this!? i have no idea what/ where im going thru..all i know is that, you hurted me...and thats because of i dont know wht!? so you must have an excusable and a very logical reason for all of this!?

my persontality test...

2006-02-04T23:14:00.000-08:00

Global Personality Test Results

Stability (76%) high which suggests you are very relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic..
Orderliness (43%) moderately low which suggests you are, at times, overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment.
Extraversion (83%) high which suggests you are overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense too often of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.

Take Free Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

draft for the yearbook..please comments are a must..(kahit bad)

2006-01-18T02:45:00.000-08:00

~BECAUSE OF YOU are the one that makes me happy, AND CAN MAKE ME FEEL BRANDNEW, panalangin ko sa habang buhay NA SANA IKAW NA NGA ANG BIGAY NANG MAY KAPAL. your my you and I'D ALWAYS STICK WITH YOU, all my life now and forever till the day i die. ABOT KAMAY ANG LANGIT kapagkapiling ka ligayay walang hanggan. FOR ALL OF MY LIFE YOU ARE THE ONE constantly on my mind AND YOULL ALWAYS BE MY BABY.~

This is a compilation song lines of how we feel and describe this musically inclined person who in the future will be, helping the people, working in Volunteer Social Societies and mor or less shouting this line until he dies..."OBJECTION YOUR HONOR!!" This would be the life of "Juan Maria Leon Gregorio Y. Chuidian 5" or Izrael known by ALL manresan's as, the person who moves as fast as the wind, with a voice that can reach a 10 on a Richter Scale, his smile is out of this world and he has a laughter that is more contagious than any other airborne virus.

Yup that's our IZRAEL, he has millions of friends, heeps of "barkada's" and also known to have the most numbers of Exrtra Curricular Actitivies. A born singer, a snappy and enthusiastic dancer and a pationate actor. Though an undefined future is ahead of him, He is not intimidated in anyway of this uknown future. This GUYS ready for anything. Although his soul has not yet completely recognized it's own counterpart,(and doesn't plan to yet..OUCH) he surely completes all of his companions lives because of his one of a kind (baduy)punch-lines, ever so enchanting voice, and a very reliable source of advice..The whole Manresa School would surely miss this guy...thanks for being a part of this batch!! Goodluck!! we'LL surely miss you...

do you need me?

2005-09-18T00:20:00.000-07:00

bakit ganun ...kung kelan ka lang kailangan nang tao...tsaka lang xa lumalapit...pero kung ok naman buhay niya...hindi xa lumalapit sayo..... kailangan ba niya talga ako? bakit ganun? sana lang lumalapit xa...para lang magkwento kung kamusta na xa? or kahit walang importanteng kailangan sabihin...kahit boring kasama...basta nanjan sa tabi ko ok na.....

im not asking you, to make me your number 1 priority....but what i really want is, for you to be with me...yung parang marinig mo lang boses ko or marinig ko lang boses mo...yung lalapit ka for the sake na magkita tayo and magsama tayo....yun lang gusto ko...hindi yunglalapit ka lang kung kelan may kailngn ka!!? your taking me for granted...sakin mo pa binubuhos yung sama nang loob mo..well im fed up...im not a doormat!!! i hate it....dahil alam mo na isang sorry mo lang mapapaluhod mo ko...well...i know it will really hurt agen...but i think it's the right thing to do...i thought we were already cool with each other...but it seems that you just want to be cool with me , to avoid anymore problems and fights... i just hate it..if you have a problem with me ...tell it to my face and i would gladly appreciate that act....you being HONEST to me...

i cant tell you how i really feel...that i really feel digusted everytime you walk up to me, that as if nothing had gone wrong...im not a tupperware or a plastic material...im human that can feel that intense pain...these problems just repeats and repeats itself......and it's really inevitable...but if were not going to do something about it, any modest or practical change...then there will be no changes...and I waNT CHANGES...GOOD changes....for the both of us...it was always about you...i never thought of my own happiness.....but why does these things happen to me...i ain't blaming you...but i just hope that you can xplain this things to me....i wont know it, i can guess it, until you yourself will tell it to my face, even if it hurts.....it would be better, than me hearing it from others...which REALLY SUCKS!!!

i cant tell you these things because im scared to lose you again..im scared of you getting mad at me...but if i want changes then this attitude i have to change....a day will come, when i myself ...will come up to you..and say to your face!!! " ang malas mo..ikaw minahal ko!!!" ayoko na!? it really hurts..but it will always hurt...if i do this the pain wont stop but it will be lessend....bhla nalang kung anong mangyayari.... :(( help!!!

EveRytHinG iS PoSSibLe....DAW!!!!

2005-09-09T23:34:00.000-07:00

nakakairita!? kasi ganito yun......i'LL Like this person..b4 (fortitude)....tapos parang yung feelings ko for that person...biglaan lang...as in parang nakilala ko xa tapos yun na!!! LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT...pero i think it doesn't work for me...parang wla kasing nangyayari...i really want the person.na xure ako..na hindi ako masasaktan....tapos here comes the other one(justice)...yung feelings ko...actually matagal na , pero dahil kay fortitude di ko napapansin....and parang kasing alam mo yun..kung kay fortitude..nasasabi ko yung mga gusto kong sabihin...kay justice hindi ko masabi?! bakit ganun?! e2 pa nung nagtanong ako kay justice, (hindi niya alam na xa na pala yun). sabi niya...everything is possible....pero duh!?!!? di parin niya nakikita yun!! i just hope na hindi niya mabasa 2....but kung mababasa niya!? GOODLUCK nalang sakin....

alam mo yun...gusto ko lang talga na malaman niya yung feelings ko, pero if that happens well....mawawala lang nang bula yung kakaonting friendship namin...eh tap0s...basta!?! i dont want to lose justice....i would really feel incomplete without justice... I REALLY HOPE....may hahantungin 2....i want this 2 end na ....ako nasasaktan eh.. kasi naman....kung kanino pa imposible dun ka pa naiinlove....kung alam lang niya!! :((

which is which....

2005-08-10T05:02:00.000-07:00

i really dont know what to do...who to choose...and where to go....the bomb baby.....
alin ba talga sa kanila...

*yung isa mahal ko(minahal)
**yung isa special(mahal ko ata)
***yung isa cute (di ko pa alam)

ewan ko lang ah..kasi naman si * minahal ko na at di na atah mababalik pah ang dating pagtitinginan namin...si ** naman ewan ko lang kung hanggang saan at kelan pa...ewan ko...parang tuwing naguusap nalang kame..parang theres something special, yet something lacking....ewan ang gulo talga...tapos si *** naman....di ko alam kung ano talga feelings ko para sakanya....sbi niya " i'LL always be here for you" tpos ano...iniwan lang ako..ewan ko lang...napakameaningful talga nang sinabi niya?! hanggang kelan pa ko masasaktan...hanggang kelan pa ko maguguluhan.... good luck nalang sakin....:) love yall "-nguya_pinto_06-"

SeasoNs Of Love...

2005-07-28T05:05:00.000-07:00

Love was spring
when feelings bloomed
as we first said hello
and looked into each others' eyes

Love was summer
when our passion rose
and we held hands
and said our vows

Love turned to autumn
When we fell apart
as things went sour
and we just can't stay together

Love changed to winter
when the nights grew cold
as we travelled life's roads
without each other....;(

(missing you....)

HaPPy BirThDay 2 Me.....StiLL uNhaPPy...heheh. : )

2005-07-24T20:32:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday to me..heheh.. i want to thank all my friends who greeted me...lavy'all....hehe...well another year has passed and another ahead of me...well, im getting ready for a lot of things.....my own life, life in college and other stuff...heheh, stiLL unhappy about the past things...but i cant do anything about it "thats life" as one of my close friends say..hehe... i really hate it when i say that i've moved on and i already forgot you...but still, obviously im still madly inlove with you...but still thanks, that in some moments of my life you made me happy...and i'll just stick with that..thanks...and now i just have to think of another year, a very busy year not only for me but to alot of person also...ehehe.....thanks ulit sa lahat nang naggreet...lavyall!!! hehehe

bakit ganun??

2005-07-07T03:24:00.000-07:00

"Bakit kung kelan akong natuto maghintay, di ka dumating......nang natuto akong magtiis, dun ka sumuko....bakit nung natutunan kitang MAHALIN, dun ka LUMAYO......bakit nang MINAHAL na kita...nag mahal ka na nang iba..."

Nakakarelate ba kayo?! hehe...parang totoo....kung kelan kailangan mo ang isang bagay....dun pa nawawala....kung kelan natutunan mong pakawalan ang isang bagay....bumabalik nanaman ito...ANO BA!? sasabayan pa ang problema nang PINAS...(as if i care)...it's like being admired....yet not being loved? it's like staring at something in the mall asking everything about it, yet, not buying it.....it's really weird in the sense,like the saying, "SET IT FREE IF IT COMES BACK IT'S YOURS BUT IF NOT IT WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE"....you've learned to throw away the past...even if it means to hurt yourself....when you have had all the strength and courage to do it....when you think all is lost.....then all of a sudden...it comes back......the effort you have given to that certain incident will really double the stress...plus the reconciling stage you will be on?>! WHAT THE HELL AM I TO DO!? am i to accept it again......and i know that i'LL be hurting....or not accept it, so the hurts wont come back.....
Really funny right?! but still...i dont find love as gold, in the rocks of life...it's like looking at coal until time passes and it turns to a diamond.......Or...i dont find love as rain that just pours and then goes away, but i find it as air, sometimes keeping quiet. but is always there,constantly hanging around...watching over you?!
NO GOODBYES
NO FAREWELLS
Just a promise that
whatever happens,
wherever we may go..
the friendship will always remain..

so kamusta naman ako....

2005-06-17T10:23:00.000-07:00

well...after waiting for so long....i realized that i am one stupid person...naniwala ako sa mga promises niya sakin....shit talaga....so ako si gago, umasa naman ako...so anong nangyari sakin...wala...ewan ko ba kung bakit nagkakaganito buhay ko...wla naman akong ginagawang mali....sobra...so ako si matapang...aawayin...KUNU!!!pero ano talo nanaman ako...wala panga shang move na ginagawa....wala na....di ko alam kung anong ginawa kong mali sa kanya sa family niya or kahit kanino...ewan ko kung bakit....parang sa isip niya..isa akong salot..ako si izrael...gago...nagpapaniwala sa kung ano ang sabihin niya....yun na yun...sa sobrang trust na binigay ko....dahil sa mga nang yari...wala na kong mabigay...sobra sobra na...di ko alam san ako makokontento...SAAN SIYA MAKOKONTENTO....ang gulo na talga...di ko alam kung kanino dapat sabihin or i open to..dahil ako na mismo nagpapakumbaba...siya pa ang may ganang lumayo....at magmalaki...diba? heLLOw....so kamusta naman ako...i have 1 million friends..but why stick with you!!!! well sa lahat nang nagbabasa nito para lang malaman nio....sooper friendly ako as in...pero sa kanya ko lang nafeel yung magaan na feeling sa kanya lang ako makapag open...ewan ko ba...there's something special, pero not yung special na iniicip niya...kasi if that is what i wanted...bakit ganito lang ang mga ginagawa ko....dpat binilhan ko na nang bahay at lupa yan!!! ako pa!! POOR!! hehe...basta i'LL just stay happy and JoLLy whatever happens...i'LL try to change as in parang black to white.....di ko na kaya...so i'LL just try new things........thanks sa lahat nang nagbasa for the time you have spared to sympathize with me...love you all....amwuah

"In his own way....and his own time"

2005-03-22T00:14:00.000-08:00

As some very religious person say.....And as Jesus said before he died, "Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing...........Into your hands i commend my spirit..." Well not everything you plan will be made into play....hindi lahat nang gusto natin masusunod...ang iba yah nasusunod pero ang iba hindi....we have to be, as players say A SPORT.... and it just happened that im on the bottom of the WHEEL OF LIFE right now.....hindi ako dadalhin nang puso at isipan ko kahit saan at ang galit ko wala ding mapupuntahan.....totoo, You have to change yourself for yourself, and not for others...but the others are needed for youself to change, inspiration kumbaga...pero kung ang inspiration mo ang mismong gumugulangtang sa buhay mo...in short siya ang sumisira sayo...weLL ibang usapan na yan...WeLL yung sinasabi kong kaaway ko sa ibang blogs, well wala na atah....ako may sira dito hindi na xa...ngayon i understand kung bakit gusto ko xang sirain.....it's because i really got hurt and i just wanted revenge.... Siya kaya ko xang sirain.....ang dami niyang weaknesses, trigger spot as we call it, pero ako 1 lang....nahuli pa niya.... ako kaya ko xang siraan, awayin lahat pero ako hindi niya kayang ganunin......im like the empire state building but im only made by 1(one) little screw...im really big, scary, and everything..pero nakita niya yung screw na yun......god....i died in his mind......why not die to the whole world...yun naman ang gusto niya eh....ewan in his own way and in his own time.........yun nalang if i still have a chance. salamat po, kung wala, sori nalang ako............di ko xa kayang saktan at hindi ko xa kayang makitang masakatan.........sabi nga nila " IF YOU LOVE SOMETHING, SET IT FREE, IF IT COMES BACK IT'S YOURS BUT IF NOT.......IT WAS NEVER MENT TO BE.." I REST MY CASE......

Raging DownfaLL of ME.....dOne by a LOSER

2005-03-20T22:38:00.000-08:00

Im now in the state of depression.....Im eating like a pig, i getting bigger... I won't even fit in heLL.... I'm back to smoking and back to my usual drinking habits..... I can't live my life normally....because I'm an abnormal....maybe i should stick to my own kind, as the MOST PERFECT PERSON ON EARTH SAID......
i considered that person as my best-friend....my mentor....my god...and my LOVE.... and i believed in everything that the person said.....GOD of all the persons in the world...of all the persons that could hurt me....WHY??? is it because this person is the only one that affects me gravely.....my parents told me to stop all my bad habits....but i did not follow them.........but when this person told me to stop....I DID, no regrets.......but now there is 1 thing I regret.......knowing, TRUSTIONG AND BELIEVING.....maxado aakong umasa.....di ko kinaya yung impact sakin.....It's true if you really love the person, you would get hurt....LOVE is really a package of the both...
I really Hate My Life.......

My new MOTTO:
L-and of sorrows
O-cean of tears
V-alley of death
E-nd of life
so never fall in love....just keep on flirting....

God ang sakit....nang sinabi niya na....para magbati kame....kailangan ko mag change.....and dapat unang baguhin ko is " wag na xang tratuhing special" and humihingi pa xa nang respeto.....siguro ako kaya ko pero ang mga kaibigan ko...WALA NUN..... Hindi ako nagagalit dahil wala kang time for me....gosh....sino ba ko.... tapos sasabihin mong trinato mo ko as a friend.....kahit papano.....parang lumalabas napilitan ka lang makipagkaibigan sakin....and sasabihin mo ikaw ang nagbibigay nang chances sakin...well ciguro 6 chances you gave me pero ako more than enough chances na ang binigay ko sayo...... tama ka hindi ko papalampasin to......wala nga akong mga kaaway... IKAW LANG....special talaga.....ikaw lang ang nakapagbago sakin, ang nagturong pwede akong maging magisa at lalong lalo na ikaw lang ang kaaway ko....special to the MAX.....if i were you magsumbong sumbong ka na.....maghanap ka na nang kakampi.....dahil pag ako nagumpisa, hindi na ko mapipigil pa....ikaw na nagsabi...i can do anything i say....buti alam mo.....pero ngayon pagod na pagod na ko........kung binabalik mo lahat nang away natin...ibabalik ko yung galit ko simula nang unang away natin......GOODLUCK......I'LL MISS THE ONLY BESTFRIEND THAT I THOUGHT I HAD<>>>>pero feeling ko wala nang lalapit at makikipag kaibigan sayo pagatapos ko maghasol na LAGIM sa buhay moh.....hanggang mag natitirang 1 cell sa dugo, sa vain, sa katawan moh,,.,hindi kita tatantanan....dahil ito ay hindi 24 oras kundi buong buhay.........im not giving up......alam kong may chance pa tayo.....kahit 1000000 more...ikaw lang ang nagdadamot....your giving up just like that.....snap......well im sorry ako hindi na ko lalapit syo....at hindi ko inaasahang lumapit ka sakin....wala na kong mali dito ikaw na.....i want to hear your side....but i think you dont want to talk about it...... fine.....KUNF SAWA KA NA......SAAKIN......AKO HINDI MAGSASAWA SAYO>>>>awayin that is....yung care and affection nasa loob ko pa.... hanapin nalang natin....oh...wala palang tayo...there never was...ikaw na nagsabi nun......RESPETO hinihingi moh.....im sorry ikaw nagsabi na wag kitang tratuhing special so wala ako ibibigay na respect...hindi ko dinedegrade ang mga pulubi pero kung gano ako nandidiri sa kanila......MAS sayo!!! mas pipiliin ko pang makipagusap sa taong grasa dahil may WORD OF HONOR siLa....eh ikaw......respeto konti, honor sa sinasabi mo.....puro ewan,let's see......try ko....uh ako walang ganun.....ssorry.........LOVE YAH....ewewewew...yun nanaman sasabihin moh!!! ever.....

Even happier than before.....

2005-03-18T06:48:00.000-08:00

So it was the last day of classes last 03/17/05 (i think)..so i was in school...chillin' with mah best bud...not just the best...but THE BOMB...the most special person for me living on this Earth... So well, we had a little misinderstanding(s)....maybe not just a little...the same night.... i had to call the person up, cause i left something which was with him...but I GOT PISSED..not by him...but later on i had to txt, to ask what was going on.....but still...we had a really nasty fight that stayed until this day....

I was so angry....GOD...if you readers would only know..how it feels........but to cut the story short...we texted each other and god, we had one fight after the other...they just came like zits.....but i have this Girl bestfriend of mine that really wanted to clean up the mess....which eventually happened...

I'm not happy because i just got fixed with my friend...but because of some accidental spillings.....i got the courage and strength to tell the person how i really felt not only to what had happened earlier but what my heart kept telling me...the true feelings that i had for the person..."THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE"..and the saying was right... i was free...i felt it and i noticed it......it was like watchin' and feeling a thorn being extracted from my body...it was the best moment of my life....not that just i fixed my problems, (fights), but also i have told the right person the right thing...and the person reacted positively....and i'm so happy that the person knows how i feel...and understood me...di nga lang talaga maiiwasang maILANG...pero still...im so happy...i hope...we could get a little more closer and i hope we get to another level...JOKE...LOLZ...but kung ito lang ang maibibigay niya saakin...it;s better than nothin.....

I'm the happiest person on Earth....(right now!!!)

2005-03-15T03:45:00.000-08:00

Im just the happiest person on earth....i want to jump, sing, dance, laugh, rejoice and just do stuff to show how happy i am....words just can't express how happy i am today.... i can never be leveled by anyone of you!!heheaheh......i just wanna thank everyone for the support and prayers(bigtym...hehehe)..

No i did not win in any sweepstakes, nor did i get a girlfriend(helow..heheh), i just got what i want...and what i really needed.....a place in the heart of a very special friend of mine...(you know who you are)....this person changed me....in a lot of aspects.... i really think this person is my inspiration....when i study, walk, do, and anything in my daily life.....this person is always on my mind.....

If you were to bribe me and make me choose between what i am feeling right now, with a million dollars and all currencies and a mansion, a title as king of london.... my own spaceship.... i would not even think about it... i would not consider nor negotiate..... that's how happy i am right now and how i wish you would feel it also(addressed to the person who made me happy...if ever you are reading this blog....)

I dont know how to tell it and express it anymore...if you guys have a punchline, saying or anything i can say to the person that i really LoVe..as a friend...can i please ask you to right it in my comment box... it would be really really appreciatted...please and thank you!!! *hugs and kisses*mwah*.....

When LOVE and HATE collides....

2005-03-14T05:23:00.000-08:00

what do you think would happen if, the one you really love, will be the person that you really hate???:'c

Do you know the feeling that when you have a great passion for that person, but you can't love that person because of uknown factors....the feeling that you always look for him/her but when he/she is already near you, IN FRONT OF YOU!!! you feel this urge to degrade, destroy and eliminate the person... after doing it you feel fulfilled but after a while you feel guilty and sad...

what the HELL is the problem?!?! is it the person, my peers, my family, or is it just ME!!!?!??!
it's really hard...if you only know my position and if only you could feel what i am feeling now!!!and i don't know what to do... i feel ...urghgh...i dont know what to do.... i feel like i want to pop... i don't know why does these things happen to ME...in my LIFE...there are lots of people out there, to be bugged.......WHY ME!!!

WiLL you remember me??

2005-03-12T21:32:00.000-08:00

How will it be to be living on the other side?How will you be when you know that I am gone?Will you miss me and shed some tears for my loss?Or will you move on and I'm nothing more than dust?What will you do when I'm no longer here with you?Who will be the one you love and live together forever?Would I still be a part of you deep in your heart?Or will I disappear with time because I have parted?Will there be a moment when you miss and think of me?Or will you be too occupied with the new love you'll find?Will there be a time when you sit alone and want me there?Or will you try to forget the happiness and love we shared?Do you think life is better on the other side of the earth?Do you think there's a happier life where we can be together?Do you think life would be any different if I am gone?No, I think not because we all will continue to move on....

Popularity is not everything...

2005-03-12T19:43:00.000-08:00

Not just to boast, but I am one popular kid. Everywhere i go, not just in school, but in the malls and in parties, surely you will see someone who knows you. There are even times that some people know you even if you don't know them. It's really hard because you have to always smile at them and you can't do things that is not poised or anything you have to remain on you proper ettiquiete.
But later on I realized that I'm not fooling them but I'm fooling myself ,because I had to put on that mask to think that i'm fooling them. They see me as this happy person, who seems like he doesn't have any problems and shit, but when they realized and when they knew the TRUE me, i got closer to my friends and they helped me in a lot of my problems and misunderstandings of mine.
And by showing my true-self i even found the person, the love of my life, and it is very beneficial.. sojust be true to yourself and love who you are and they'll love you

meant to be....

2004-12-09T03:01:00.000-08:00

There's this one person who is always at our side, whatever happens.. When we are right they are there to compliment our accomplishments or our right doings, when we are wrong they are the first to give you a hug and talk to you so that you will realize your wrong doings... This person whom we can also call our bestfriend, who helps us in whatever it is, whatever they need they will go hand in hand with you to reach your gaol. Even if it takes their own properties and possessions. The persons who understands you, as if you were batteries that nothing would work out, if your not with each other.

You can see that your so compatible as in, whatever he/she likes, dislikes, needs, uses are all the same. And you think that you can be one of the most popular pairs in the history of the world.When you wake up in the morning his/her name makes you feel you had slept for a thousand years and you dont feel stress in your body. he/she is your inspiration and your light And there comes this time when you can't take it anymore, you just have to show, share, and give your love to that special person who is your BESTFRIEND. And when that person knows it, he/she thinks it's just ok for your bestfriend to fall in love with you. But you realize that your bestfriend feels awkward when he/she's with you.

what would you do... and you don't know if your in love with the person or your just in love with the idea of love... so whatever happens

the worst is over....

2004-12-06T02:22:00.000-08:00

Have you ever found or met a person, whom you cannot lie to or to whom you cannot hurt. The imense feeling you feel inside everytime you see this person smile? Everytime you here his/her joke and even if its really corny you can't resist but to laugh. The person who, when feeling sad, you feel sad to if not more sad than the person itself. A person who you cannot afford to see even just in a minute in your everyday life. I HAVE....

This person who i cannot name, and if ever you read this, you know who you are. This person has changed me a lot this is the only person, who they say can make your heart faster and slower at the same time, and everyime this persons smiles at me...OH MAN!!GRR!! I can't even explain the intensity that I feel everytime it happens, it is like you heart jumps up and down and you can just feel it pumping. You can also feel your blood circulating and you can feel it's heat. I really feel blessed that my special person is a friend, until the day came that i had to tell...

I got this friend to help me, i did not know how to approach him but my other friends helped me, and so he told me to tell my SpeciaLperson what i really felt and hey that's not the catch. I still want this person to know that the special person of my special person is just taking their friendship for granted and i didn'd want to tell the person because I know that the person might get hurt. And so i did not tell the person untill the day came that my conscience could bare it no more. and so i told it to the person.

Shock was the first reaction, but what i was shocked about was the 2nd reaction, "oh! tapos ka na maglabas? ang drama mo naman, parang yun lang wala ka namang masamang ginagawa eh. Ok lang yun!" I was so surprised was, the person did not get mad and that's still not it, i told the person that i did not want to do anything about Life, Love, School or any thing as in no communication then the person said " huh? hindi, kailangan pa kita".....I know that the person doesn't mean it like literally but still as a friend that is one thing that you would like to hear, because you feel so special to the person and you feel so important. Eventhough the person needs me for the lovelife it's ok.. at least the person trusts me and takes me for what i am and everything. Know i really know this person's true color they say this person is MAYABANG, FEELING, LAKI ULO(sa taas), and IRRESPONSIBLE AND IMMATURE.. Now i have proven all of you wrong..This person is one understanding, loving, and RESPONSIBLE PERSON.

And know the worst is over, and i have learned from this person that you have to be yourself be true to yourself. and that nobosy can control but you. I also have learned that you must have a strong faith in God and to your LOVE POWER...heheh...im being maDRAMA again.. well i still dont know if i love this person but one thing i know, this person is so special that i changed, a little, and made me feel good not only to others but also to myself and I'm not thankful for that but i really salute this person, whom my heart has followed and eventhough i know there is NO FUTURE ahead of us. Still i will be your friend and i hope me also to you! THANKS FRIEND, HOPE TO KNOW YOU BETTER AND THANK YOU FOR THE TRUST AND RESPECT YOU HAVE GIVEN ME..mwah..ingat nalang...hehe